I have a love – hate relationship with you.  Yes, you are amazing.  I will give you that.  You let me buy disgusting amounts of cheese at one time and no one judges me.  Your gas is 3.65 a gallon.  That in itself is worthy of a quick make out session.  Your hot dog and soda combo is 1.50 and more importantly, your “Fat Free” chocolate twist yogurt that tastes like it was churned by Swiss Miss and  a Keebler elf.  (On a side note, this is a Seinfeld episode waiting to happen because there is NO WAY IN HELL that this yogurt is fat free.)  It tastes like the creamiest sweet treat you ever had.  I know, I have had fat free yogurt before and you might as well be licking on the side of a paint can – an old paint can.  You know the kind that is dusty and contains spider webs.  Anyway, I get distracted.  Costco, I love you….until my very best pals enter the building with me because as soon as I cross that threshold, I hate you with every fiber of my being.

There is a level of “showing off” that my kids truly do extend when we get out into large public places like this.  There was some name calling and running wild along with throwing VERY unnecessary things in the cart.  WAY too many treats and LA took it upon himself to “carbo-load” because he put 7 packages of ravioli, tortellini and pasta in there.  I kept ONE.  He was hysterical.  He needed to have them all.

My sweet Eden helped me guide the cart and be my go-to gal.  I always tell here that we have to stick together because we are going to be the only girls in our whole family.  Even the dog has  a weiner……no nuts, but still the tubular dong.  I am out on that.  The 2 times a year it pops out I have a nervous breakdown.

The sad thing is that I don’t even buy anything good…..300 dollars for about 19 kinds of yogurt, some Guinness, a rug for the back door, 4 cases of Lacroix, some K-cup coffee’s, 6 cartons of milk, bananas, orange juice, one giant genoa salami, refried beans and some kirkland brand vodka.  That about sums it up.  Absolutely nothing fun.  Damnit.

So I love you and hate you all at the very same time, COSTCO.  I am hungry so I may just get a pitchfork to open that giant 17 lb can of refried beans I bought.  You know I have a stock pile of Taco Bell sauces…..and vodka.